We All Should Care

Accept the call for a deeper purpose.

It is hard to find any unbiased information on the West Memphis 3 and most people have strong opinions but it is easy to become passionate about the travesty of our so-called justice system, especially in relation to this case.

Damien Echols, Jesse Misskelley Jr., and Jason Baldwin –known as the West Memphis 3– were arrested in West Memphis, Arkansas June 3, 1993 for the assault, mutilation, and brutal murders of 3 children. The evidence that connected Damien Echols, Jesse Misskelley Jr., and Jason Baldwin to the murders was a love of Metallica, Stephen King, and black t-shirts. Oh and the worst part of it all *rolls eyes* Damien dyed his hair and was interested in Wicca. The case was actually a witch-hunt! They were no more than scapegoats for a small town community plagued by police corruption and Satanic panic. Seriously, there were no murder weapons, no evidence whatsoever linking them to the crime. Only small town mentality and that they were different, they stuck out like sore-thumbs in a town of good ol’ boys. They were arrested and convicted based on Jesse Misskelley Jr.’s (who is considered mentally handicapped and has an IQ of 72) confession during a 12 hour police interview, without counsel and without parental consent. Only 45 minutes of the police interrogation in which Jessie “confesses” (which he later unsuccessfully tried to recant) to being involved, alongside Damien and Jason, in the murders to West Memphis police was recorded.

There are many discrepancies in this case including much of Jesse’s confession. Wounds on the children thought to be bite marks did not match molds of the three’s teeth so they were assumed to be made with a serrated knife now have been decided to be caused by animals.

Damien, whom I have had the incredible fortune of receiving a letter from, sits in solitary confinement on death row waiting for lethal injection. Jason Baldwin was sentenced to life without parole. Jessie Misskelley got life plus 40 years.

Arkansas Circuit Court has turned down countless appeals, change of venue requests, etc. Thanks to technology and DNA testing that was not available 16 years ago, on August 10th Jessie Misskelley and Jason Baldwin began a hearing on their motion for a new trial based on ineffective counsel. Damien Echols is seeking a new trial in Arkansas Supreme Court based on new DNA and forensic evidence and juror misconduct. DNA tests found that no DNA taken from the crime scene matches Damien, Jason, or Jessie.

Enraged? Want to help? Sign the petition here, write letters, and visit wm3.org
(which redirects you here while the site is down for maintenance)
www.freewestmemphis3.org
Also you can get live updates at Twitter

[Image courtesy of WM3.org]

If you look above you’ll see the one thing I wear on my body that I almost NEVER take off. I actually have two of them, one on each wrist.
I feel naked without them, honestly. I am proud to say that I am a Spencerian! Everywhere I go, anyone that talks to me for more than five minutes will, as a result, learn about Spencer Bell.
Just because I’m not writing about him, doesn’t mean that I’m not talking about him. You’d be hard pressed to find one day in which his name, his music, or his quotes aren’t passing my lips.
I love, more than anything, to read people’s stories about him, to know that as amazing as he is, he was/is just like each of us.
Flawed, yet beautiful.
There are days, I find myself in a situation, where I’m not sure what to do, so I ask myself. WWSD? Because I think, even as young as he was, he had it figured out. Hell, a lot better than I do at any rate. He knew to just grab life and enjoy the ride.
For some of us, that’s scary, right? To just let go and BE.

“…..I stomp down on the gas and go really, really fast…..” ~Spencer Bell

Sometimes, we need to throw caution to the wind, and just do what makes us happy, Spencer has taught me that, among so many other things.

I owe that man several beers.. one day, Spence .. me, you, and one hell of a hangover the next day.

There is only a handful of people that will die and literally bring me to my knees. When I heard that Adam Goldstein, known as DJ AM to the masses, had passed away at the too-young age of 36, I crumbled. I cried bawled and crawled under my covers, trying to make the world disappear, not wanting to believe the truth.

Adam was nothing personally to me; he was someone that I looked up to as a musician. He was someone I had exchanged a few MySpace messages with, but I did not have the good fortune of knowing him personally or even ever getting a chance to see him spin live.

My best friend and I had a bit of a joke when it came to DJ AM – Every time he heard I was coming to Vegas (where he spent his DJ residency) he ran. Most literally every time that I was in Las Vegas (all six times, thus far) he was not there.

Last year after hearing of Adam and Travis Barker’s near death plane crash, I counted my lucky stars that they both survived. Two of my favorite people, two people I admire, two outstanding musicians. I thought to myself, “what would happen if the world… if I… lost one of them?” I ended up putting that thought into the back of my mind, thinking I wouldn’t have to retrieve it any time soon. Unfortunately, I was wrong.

I’ve heard from many people that they didn’t know who DJ AM was, which is a shame. Unfortunately, people will cling to him now that he’s gone. Obsessing over how fanatic they were of him while he was here.

Those people don’t know Adam. They don’t know that he collected sneakers.

That he loved his cat with all his heart.

That Travis was not just his music collaborator, but his best friend.

That his favorite watch burned up in the plane crash last year.

That he was a genuinely a good-hearted person who had been through his fair share of near death experiences, hardships, loves, break ups and turmoil.

Dear Adam,

I cannot believe that you’re really gone. You were in an innovator, a motivator, a prompter to the movers and shakers. I am completely devastated by the news of your passing. I hope that wherever you are that you’ve got your iPod, fit with all the songs ever made… your Mac, blasted with all your stickers… and your turntables, making jams for all those who want to dance.

Rock on, man.

[[photos courtesy of myspace.com/djamone]]

This post was inspired not only by Spencer Bell, but also a very dear friend of mine, who shall remain nameless, yes he knows who he is.
Today, I was speaking to said friend, and he said to me that he was going to be forced to do grunt work for the rest of his days, instead of making a living creating music. Now, the entire time I have known him, I have always said that he could aspire to greatness. Potentially many of us could, if we just TRY. Stop settling for mediocre and luke warm.
Search out the passion, the heat, the FIRE and go for it.
I politely, but firmly reminded him that in the words of Spencer, there is NO Plan B. Read Spencer’s thoughts on it below:

When the passion was new and shameless
I knew that in time my persistence would be rewarded.
So- to insure those rewards, I condemned myself to the life of an artisan.
I did it swiftly as I could so that I didn’t have a chance to think it out long enough to change my mind.

Plan A: Make good art for money for food
Plan B: There is no plan B

My friend then asked me, if I thought there was still a chance he could do something with music.
I simply replied “As long as you’re breathing.”
Remember this…
Never give up.
Never give in.
Always, always push yourself harder than you think you are capable of, go further than you think you can. Then once you have climbed that mountain, and you look back down over the trail you have carved up the side of it, you will truly KNOW where you’ve been. By token it will also show you where you can go. Which is, anywhere you set your mind and your heart on.

In the words of Louise Driscoll:

Hold Fast your dreams!

Within your heart

Keep one, still secret spot

Where dreams may go,

And sheltered grow–

Where doubt and fear are not.

O, keep a place apart,

Within your heart,

For little dreams to go!

Think still of lovely things that are not true.

Let wish and magic work at will in you.

Be sometimes blind to sorrow. Make believe!

Forget the calm that lies

In disillusioned eyes.

Though we all know that we must die,

Yet you and I

May walk like gods and be

Even now at home in immortality.

We see so many ugly things–

Deceits and wrongs and quarrellings;

We know, alas! We know

How quickly fade

The color in the west,

The bloom upon the flower,

The bloom upon the breast

And youth’s blind hour.

Yet keep within your heart

A place apart

Where little dreams may go,

May thrive and grow.

Hold fast–hold fast your dreams.

I’ve always heard one of the million things that sets us apart from other mammals is our ability to dream, our ability to pursue those dreams. Do you want to let your dreams fade, and wonder what if?
Or do you want to be able to say “I gave it everything I had.”
I choose the latter of the two.
What ifs, maybes , could I? They will consume you, and eat you alive.
Don’t let that happen.
Remember, if you have a passion, there is NO Plan B.

If you wish to learn more about Spencer, please click his name above, he is amazing, a lighthouse in a tumultuous storm.

[[Image courtesy of google images, Spencer Bell words courtesy of spencerbellmemorial.ning.com]]

I know that I do an incredible amount of talking about Spencer Bell, and that by doing so, you may think that I have him on a pedestal.
Please, allow me to put that to rest, right now.
I would NEVER place him, or anyone else on one, because we are all human, we are all flawed, and humans aren’t meant to sit still for that long, we’d fall. The last thing I would ever want, is for Spencer to fall.
I may think his soul is a light that can illuminate even the darkest corner, but I do not think that he is without flaws. I think that it is the fact that he was so perfectly imperfect, that draws me to him.
His ability to put his passion, his rights, his wrongs, his thoughts, his feelings, so much of him into his art amazes me, and it gives me hope. Hope that I can and possibly am doing the same thing with my own writing.
The Legacy he has left behind, is awe inspiring, and I want to help share it with as many people as possible.
I want people to know Spencer, his work, his Legacy.
I want them to know that even though we are all merely human, and only ONE person, that we CAN make a difference.
I want them to know that his family and friends are among some of the most amazingly kind, and wonderful people I have ever been privileged to meet, and we should thank them for sharing Spencer with us.
I want them to know the meaning of LIVING.
If you want to know more about Spencer, please click his name above and it will direct you to his Legacy site, and if you’d like to give to Adrenal Cancer Research (the horrible disease that stole him away) then please go HERE.. know that every bit makes a difference.

[[Image courtesy of spencerbellmemorial.ning]]

While most people might find it strange that I’m writing a “soap box” about water, anyone who knows me will not find this odd. I am a self-proclaimed huge fan of water. I very rarely drink soda ever – and if I do its club soda, which is basically just fizzy water, right? How some people make it through their lives never drinking water frustrates and confuses me. Water is the purest form of happiness to me. To drink a glass of [filtered] ice water is bliss.

Anyone else who is a fan of water has his or her preferences. I would rather die from thirst than to drink tap water. I loathe it. It makes me cringe. Someone once had the guts to tell me that you couldn’t tell the difference between bottled/filtered water and tap water. They are unfortunately no longer with us because I had to kill them from their stupidity. Anyone with a mouth can taste the difference between tap and bottled/filtered water.

I will go one up from there and say that there are even some brands of bottled water that I dislike. Dasani, being the main one. Now, if it’s 110 degrees and there’s nothing but a Coke machine around – I will drink Dasani if I HAVE to. (And I mean there better not be another place to get water within ten miles of me.) There’s just something about it that tastes bitter. It has a bit of a scent as well, it leaves a little something in your mouth and no matter how cold it is, it still doesn’t taste good. (Not to mention that it’s water made by a Coke company. That’s a whole other rant right there.)

There’s much to debate about bottled water vs a tap filter or a Brita pitcher. My entire childhood I was spoiled with a Brita pitcher. For “green” reasons, a Brita pitcher, tap filter attachment or the water that comes from your icemaker in your refrigerator is better. They’re all reusable and help the environment by not creating more unused plastic waste.

I personally still prefer bottled water. If you recycle it can’t be that bad. At least you’re doing your part after you have your delicious drink! My personal favorite bottled waters are almost all Nestlé. Pure Life, Arrowhead, Ozarka, Perrier… my only other favorite that isn’t a Nestlé brand is Figi. The reason why I love these waters (besides the fact that Perrier just fascinates me…) is because they are crisp, clean and taste like nothing. If I’m drinking water and it tastes like nothing, smells like nothing, then they got it right because that’s what water should taste like.

[[image courtesy google.com/images]]

Yesterday I rented the movie Obsessed and along with being a really good movie (with a really good soundtrack) it made me think about sexual harassment.

In the movie, Lisa (Ali Larter) is an office temp where the successful Derek Charles (Idris Elba) works. He’s married to Sharon. (Beyoncé Knowles) Lisa becomes infatuated with Derek and the idea of having him and sexually assaults him in the bathroom at the Christmas party. Meanwhile we learn that Sharon used to be an office temp until Derek took her off the market. Derek hides all of his brief and odd encounters from Sharon because he’s embarrassed.

Derek’s best friend and co-worker, Ben (Jerry O’Connell) even makes a few crude sex jokes about Lisa’s hotness and how Sharon would never find out if they ever did anything. To Derek’s credit, he’s probably more faithful than all the men on the planet combined. Ali Larter is stunning in this film and if she was sexually assaulting me in a bathroom after a few dirty martinis, I couldn’t say that I would mind.

This movie of course brings up the discussion of sexual harassment and inner-office relationships. I have been personally sexually harassed at a job and yes, it’s embarrassing. Just like with Derek, people didn’t believe me that it was going on. However, Derek had it harder than I did because males filed only 15.9% of the sexual harassment charges in 2008. I’m sure there were actually more cases than that but some men are too proud to admit it.

Sharon, Derek’s wife, even made him move to the Four Seasons for three months because she didn’t believe he was telling her the truth about what was going on.

I think that a lot of people are sexually harassed and they don’t realize it. I also think that a lot of people sexually harass others without knowing it. Did you know just joking with your co-workers about a dirty joke or sex is sexual harassment? Sharing a “funny” picture message? Talking about your personal relationships? Touching someone on the arm if they don’t want to be touched? All of that is sexual harassment and you can be fired from your job for any of it.

Remember that the work place is for work and TGI-Fridays is for cocktails and dirty talk afterwards. What would you do if you were in Derek’s position? Lisa’s position? Sharon’s position? Or what if you were in the position of the boss and you saw what was going on but you didn’t do anything?

[[image courtesy of google.com/images]]

Spencer Bell has left behind so many profound words. His lyrics are powerful, and the song “Dandelions” is no exception. In fact, it’s one of my favorites.
Don’t let life pass you by, enjoy it, take it with a grain of salt, none of us get out alive anyway, sit back, enjoy the ride. I’m sure we could all take away something different, and that is what I take away from it.
Spencer had a way of putting things, so that all of us could get it.
I love that. Blunt, straight forward and to the point.
“To all our friends who will meet us at the end.”
I don’t know what supremely awaits me after this life, we can’t know with certainty. Whatever it is, I hope Spencer is there on the other side with a cold beer and is ready to do some talking.
If you’d like to know more about Spencer, please visit his Legacy site by clicking on his name at the top of this post.
And if you’d like to donate to help fund adrenal cancer research, please click HERE. We can make a difference!

[[Image provided by and property of spencerbellmemorial.ning.com]]

My first time on a Greyhound bus was in 2002 on a trip to Dallas, TX. From Kansas City to Dallas it’s an 8-hour drive, or a 12-hour trip via Greyhound. I swore up and down that I would never ride a Greyhound again because of the giant inconvenience that it is, however this last week I was forced to ride one from Kansas City to Detroit because there was no other option.

I had a lot of time to think on the 20-hour bus ride to Detroit. By the time that I was coming home on my 22-hour bus ride home, I decided that I was going to write an article about my experience and the giant inconvenience that is the Greyhound bus system.

Firstly, for those who haven’t ever rode a Greyhound before, there’s a lot of ‘hurry up and wait’. Most of them have two or four hour layovers in random odd places. (Like hole-in-the-wall-Iowa or Bethany, Missouri.)

There are absolutely no security checks. This is what bothers me most of Greyhound’s system and standards. They will literally let anyone ride their bus. You do not have to have an ID to purchase a ticket – they do not check any baggage or even have something so simple as metal detectors. They literally let anyone on board.

On a four hour layover on my way home in Chicago I started talking to two kids about this. One girl was 15 years old, the boy was 16. Both were traveling alone, both had bought their tickets with cash. Either of them could have been running away and they could disappear forever. The girl was very cute and very naïve, taking to anyone who wanted to talk to her, telling strangers on the bus that her uncle was sending her back to Oklahoma to live. She mentioned the name of the city where she was going, what school she went to… anything you wanted to know about her, you could have asked and she would have told you. She was very lucky that I sat by her and talked to her, keeping her company the whole ride. She rode with me until Kansas City and then I told her what bus to get on afterwards. I could have been a bad stranger; I could have been someone who wanted to harm her.

The 16-year-old boy brought up a good point as we were sitting in the Chicago bus station – the Greyhound would be the perfect way to transport drugs. No one needs an ID, no bags are searched, and you get on and get off wherever you want and no one would ever notice.

However, it’s not drugs that I’m worried about – it’s weapons. Because there are no security measures, no metal detectors – imagine just how many people have knives and guns that are sitting next to you. Imagine why those people are carrying those weapons. It’s a scary thought.

And lastly, with how many people are riding these buses, how much money Greyhound is pulling in per year, they can’t afford cleaner facilities? I find that hard to believe. In my trip I only found one bus station to be sanitary – the St. Louis bus station. It surprised the hell out of me too. I’ve been to St. Louis many times and it’s not a very clean city as a whole, so for the Greyhound stop to be clean? I’m very impressed. In the Kansas City, Detroit and Chicago bus stops they were all so filthy that only one or so of the stalls were clean. On my way to Detroit in my layover in Chicago someone threw up next to me in the bus stop and no one cleaned it up. It just stayed there on the floor, people walking around it like it wasn’t there.

Greyhound’s website wants you to believe that they are a clean, efficient and economically friendly way to travel. If they actually want people to believe that and continue to ride with them, they should change the way that they do things by hiring friendly people, retraining the ones they have, cleaning up what’s disgusting and employing new security options – actually employing ANY security options would be a start. Safety for their customers should be their number one priority.

[[image courtesy of google.com/images]]

I have just returned from the most awe inspiring, amazing weekend ever. It was definitely life altering, on a few levels, in fact.
I trekked from Charlotte, North Carolina to Auburn Hills, Michigan, for the Spencer Bell Legacy show, and it was so much more than I ever could have imagined.
It was very last minute when I found out I could go, I had to rearrange my entire life in a matter of 8 days, and had a death in the family to deal with on top of that, but somehow I managed. I have never been happier to say that. Nothing would have kept me away though.
I was blessed to have been able to converse with Spencer’s mom, she is the sweetest woman that I have ever had the fortune of meeting, I believe. I’m thrilled beyond words that I get to help keep Spencer’s memory alive, that I get to introduce him to people, and help show the world, how beautiful his soul was and is.
No, Spencer was not perfect, he was human, flawed, I’m sure he was extremely frustrating at times, irritating at others, but he was beautiful, and beyond any doubt, loved in his entirety. Yes, even when they wished to pinch his head off. *laugh*
I can’t say that I knew Spencer when he was alive, I got to know him through his art, his music, his words, so my connection to him is from one writer, to another, from one human being to another.
Myself, and two of my very best friends, Kasey and Jodie, shared the weekend experience together, and we all took away something different.
My intention was to go and honor Spencer, to enjoy some music, to just have a great time, in his honor. I did all of those things, and more. I reconnected with a part of ME that I had forgotten, I saw an outpouring of love, and support for Spencer and the Bell family, that was astounding and beautiful beyond compare. I got to hear Spencer stories, and connect with people that I never would have, had I not found him, courtesy of Jackson Rathbone.
Though Spencer wasn’t with us in his physical form, I know that he was with us in spirit, in soul, and he was partying his A** off, believe that! The bands that performed were AMAZING, and he had a hand or influence in each of them, at some point,in some way.*Smile*
The Stevedores, Tin Tin Can,Drew and the Medicinal Pen,100 Monkeys and we even got to hear first hand, roommate stories about Spencer, from Orson Brawl, it was an experience I’ll never forget. I’ll be talking about it for years to come.
Old friends reconnecting, music that made me dance non stop for two days, the musicians were incredible to hang out with,just talk to, making new friends that I know will last a lifetime, and most importantly, showing Spencer, and the world, that he hasn’t been forgotten, that he still matters, that he always will.
In my favorite words describing Spencer, courtesy of Jay “What a beautiful soul, that Spencer Bell”.
Spencer, wherever you are, we love you, and your legacy will live on, in the hearts, minds, and souls of everyone you have touched.

If you’d like to get to know more about Spencer, then please visit Legacy, if you’d like to donate to Research for Adrenal Cancer then please, go HERE.

I’d like to give a special shout out and thank you to my personal (and professional) photographer for the weekend Jodie Platz without her, I would have been forced to take the pictures, but she took on that job, allowing me to dance all weekend, so THANK YOU, Jo Jo. The photos are incredible, as your work always is. You should click on her name and check out her other work.